Exam, Angels and Demons and Chic

Haloooo…

Ehem, ehem…

Nggak kerasa udah seminggu lebih gue nggak blogging. Padahal tiap hari ol fb. Which means, gue lagi have nothing to write. Really. Lack of ideas.
Well, anyway…minggu ini gue UAS. Minggu depan gue remidian. Moga aja remidinya dikit, atau malah nggak remidi sama sekali.
Review dikit :
Matik : hancur lebur jadi bubur!
Bahasa Inggris : alhamdulillah…gak mumet.
Penjas : hadeehh…tapi lumayan.
Fisika : so so (hhh…paling juga remed)
Agama : aduh, essaynya lebih gampang timbang multiple. Ayat-ayatnya kabur semua. (kemana?)
Kimia : gak meyakinkan sama sekali…(bbbeeh!)
Jurnal : okelah…
Bahasa Indonesia : homonym sama homofon gue kebalik. Mampus, dah!
PKn : gak yakin, tapi kayaknya gak remed, nih.
Seni rupa : walah, I wasn’t born for art!
Sejarah : biiiuuuh…otak gue tua bener, dah!

Biologi, conversation…dihantam besok!

Gue baru baca Angels and Demons lagi. Ini baru yang kedua kalinya. Dulu pas yang pertama, pinjam punya Kepsek gue. Sekarang, gue donlot ebook-nya. Dan Brown gak ada matinya. Keren mampus!
Pasti udah pada liat filmnya, huhu…Nasib gue tinggal di pedalaman (baca : kota kecil), jadi mesti nunggu sebulan lagi biar bisa pinjem VCDnya. Hiuhh.


Minggu kemarin, gue beli CHIC. Hehe…sok tua, ya gue. Beli majalah buat konsumsi twentysome lady gitu. Gue kehabisan Girlfriend sekalian Cosmogirl. Ugh! KaWanku aja juga kehabisan. Hah! Akhirnya beli CHIC aja.
Isinya oke, cuman yah…lebih serius daripada CG, GF. (ada tentang s*ks-nya juga). Secara majalah ‘dewasa’. Tapi kan gue beranjak dewasa, udah mau 18, jadi ya ok aja. Heheh... (senyum curang)

Eh, udah ya. Mau belajar Bio nih...bye! Mmmwwah!

_a.risk-taker_

Us, Who were Looking For Something to Remember

Ah, Juni!
Bulan depan Bali udah nunggu buat disamperin. Sounds exciting. Pantai, pura, shops, dan best friends!

Dan oh, ya!
Pacar! Kalau punya…

Eh, kayaknya kalo di‘tembak’ di Bali nanti, seru juga, ya?! Romantis, tepatnya. Di Kuta, pas sunset. Oh, how sweet…

I know it would never happen to me, but hei…I have my own dream. And there’s nothing wrong about dreaming, right?

Kalo sampe iya pun, aku nggak bakal nerima. Aku juga nggak bisa nolak, kalo dia (baca:123). Aku bakal bilang, “Tunggu aku pas hari kelulusan…but this, would be the sweetest memory I’ve ever got…from you, Love…”

Haha! I sound silly, don’t I? Or pathetic? Which one do you think I do?

I went to Ngebel couple weeks ago. Sorry for the late. I’ve reached the limit of my net connection. So I had to wait to post it on 1^st of June. Hehe…

It was a great day! High school…
First year : Nerd, plain
Second year : Play, fun, naughty
Third year : Pray, struggle

_a.risk-taker_

My New Header

Anyone could guess what's the picture about?

_a.risk-taker_

I Can’t Forgive People Easily, Doesn’t Mean That I Can’t Forgive At All

He did something wrong yesterday.
And I felt like I was the only person who’s trying to keep this relationship goes right.
And simply, he didn’t even realize that he’s done something wrong yesterday.
He acted like everything was “OKAY” this morning. In fact, everything wasn’t “OKAY”. Well, at least for me.
But then, he did something nice today, without even saying ‘sorry’ for what he’s done yesterday.

He’s just so insensitive. And that fact, makes me wonder even harder, “Why do I love that kind of guy?”. I’ve been always dreaming about a guy whom is so sensitive to whatever I feel. And he’s absolutely not. Not at all.
Hhmm…I’m sick and tired of these…but I just can’t quit. Knowing he loves me so, with all his imperfections, that’s enough and I’ll stand it for some more time ahead. I guess…

You’re not perfect, and so am I. So, love, lets make this relationship goes perfect with our imperfections and our immature attitude. I’m trying, I hope so are you.

To you, with all my weakness and strength in a box with a ribbon on it…

Hhh…I don’t know I just love him so bad…weird…

_a.risk-taker_

Life Doesn’t Give You Difficulties, It Is Your Choice to Make It Difficult or Easy

Hidup…
Jalani saja hidup seperti sungai. Mengalir … Tak usahlah memutuskan ini itu untuk berhenti sejenak demi hal-hal yang tidak esensial dalam arus. Biarkan arus itu membawa kita ke muara akhir yang disiapkan untuk kita.
Hidup…
Tak usah memusingkan sesuatu yang tidak berpengaruh atau hanya memiliki pengaruh sesaat untuk kita. Biarkan saja hal-hal kecil itu larut, jangan biarkan mereka membuat kita berhenti sejenak pun. Jangan biarkan mereka mengambil alih konsentrasi kita akan tujuan akhir yang menunggu kita di depan.
Jika mencintai, biarkan tumbuh alami. Jangan dibunuh atau diberi penyubur biar cepat tumbuh. Biarkan saja! Hal yang tumbuh liar itu terkadang indah, kok.
Jika berhasil, bersyukurlah. Jangan terbuai dengan pujian. Itu hanya akan melemahkan kita. Trust me!
Jika gagal, jangan menyalahkan siapa-siapa, tidak juga diri kita. Memang saat itu bukan waktu kita untuk berhasil, ada orang lain yang akan lebih bijak memanfaatkan keberhasilan itu.
Jika terseok, cari alas kaki baru untuk mendukung pemilihan jalan. Mengerti?
Jika tersandung, bersyukurlah ada kerikil itu. Mengingatkan kita untuk sesekali merunduk.
Jangan biarkan otak berhenti berputar dan terasah. Beranikan diri untuk mengambil resiko daripada nanti menyesalinya karena tidak pernah mencobanya.

***

I don’t know why, I just wanna write this kind of writing suddenly. My deep brain might just worked a way deeper than usual.
If you don’t mind, after you read this, share me your essential things. I do wanna know about those of yours, really.
Thank you!

_a.risk-taker_

Quotes...

From every wound there's a scar, and every scar tells a story. A story that says, I survived.

Nowhere on your birth certificate did it say life would be fair.

***

I love those quotations. From Glam Girls, I just finished it.

_a.risk-taker_

What I Hate and I Love

So, how was everything going, people? On my spot, everything’s just great! I’ll tell you why, at the end of the post. Well now I’m gonna share the things I hate and I love. I did arrange them from the most. So, here they are :


:( Called by “Sitoh” by anyone but my Nimo. Ugh! Why can’t they just respect my own name? Call me “Mazhi” or “Masithoh” and I will appreciate you more!
:( Snake!
:( Pink!
:( Shrimp! Ugh! I’m allergic to shrimp!
:( Being fooled! Well, who doesn’t?
:( Got my SMS unreplied. Feels like I’m alone. Really.
:( Too many holiday(s)! I hate that! School is the only place where I can meet him,123!
:( Backstabbers! They’re so mean!
:( Got a bad mark for Biology. It makes me feel so stupid!
:(‘kancrut” songs, by ‘kancrut” bands!
:( Got sweaty when I’m nervous.
:( Failed to throw my basketball in.
:( Found my shoes in a dusty condition in my cupboard.

:) My family!
:) 123!
:) Everything that contains green in it!
:) Sneakers!
:) Being loved. Well, who doesn’t?
:) Stay longer at school with him.
:) Love songs! Especially, which is sung by guys.
:) Love stories! Make me wanna be them, in the story.
:) Facebook! Haha!
:) Finally got what I want for a long time.
:) My books!
:) My room!
:) My cell phone.
:) My notebook.
:) My blog.
:) Found my uniform was ready to wear.
:) Shouting “Yes, I did it!”. Makes me feel so genius. Weird, huh?
:) Internet!

***

The reason why everything was so great this week is that I’m getting closer with him. Messages every afternoon or night and a li’l conversation at school. He makes my everyday!
But still, I can’t find my reason why I love him. Some may say, there’s always ‘why’ for anything that happened, but this one, there’s no ‘why’. Well, no ‘why’ needed actually…to fall in love. Yes or no?

_a.risk-taker_

Life…Well, Define It!

I tell you, life is just about working, whatever the job is. Almost everytime we have to work on something. Your career, your schooling stuff, or your homework. It’s a real home-work I mean, the things you do at home like helping your mother clean the kitchen, cleaning your room or even your house, and blablabla…
Aren’t we sick and tired of those sometimes? Admit it, cause I am. It’s like we’d never have a real break time. When we've found a place that could give us a spot to relax, it’s only for seconds. Never really have minutes, even hours. Got it?

***

This week, I had my midterm test. Ugh! I tell you, it was so frustrating. Like you don’t have anything else to think but the tests. Chemistry, math, phy, bio and so on. And I’m a science class student. The science tests made my my brain so full of numbersome thingies. When I had the chemistry test, my brain is like full of acid, liquid base, salt hydrolysis, etc. When I had my math test, it’s full of polynomial, invers, function, etc. They’re making my brain less responsive of anything else (such as : foods, television, gossips and my dreamy bf). Really, I mean it.

***

But you can’t just run away from all of those, right?

I have to think about it positively, so I can make it funnier and more enjoyable. It’s worth to do for my future. And also, it’s worth to tell you what I’m thinking. Cause I can’t keep it alone. I’m not an introvert person. So, share me something after you read this!

Love you all, especially for you who give me comment on this! ;)

_a.risk-taker_

Percobaan Hari Ini, Fashion Blogger dan Mencontreng

Hari ini gue nyumbang suara gue buat Indonesia. Yap, hari ini gue mencontreng! Treng, treng, treng, kawan-kawan! Dan jari kelingking gue dengan bangganya mempersembahkan diri untuk di celupkan ke botol tinta hari ini.

Cakep banget dah kutek gue!

Hari ini, gue ngabisin waktu sehabis nyontreng buat mainan photoshop. Beberapa eksperimennya antara lain :

Mmm…anyway, beberapa hari yang lalu gue beli majalah Girlfriend, dan disana dibahas para fashion blogger yang pada superb! Ini dia linknya :

http://cheapskatechic.blogspot.com

http://amlul.com

http://gretaarienti.blogspot.com

www.seaofshoes.com

www.fashiontoast.com

http://luluandyourmom.blogspot.com

My favorite is www.seaofshoes.com. You can check them out and tell me which one is your favorite! I’ll be happy if you share your thought so! Thanks a bunch!

_a.risk-taker_

Zhilovephobia : The Return

Assalamu’alaikum wr.wb

Helloooooooo…

I’m back! I’m totally back!

But I still have nothing to post here. It’s like my ideas stopped after my hiatus. I’ll post something, better the good one, as soon as possible. I promise.

Now, I just wanna greet you and I’ll blogwalk first to grow my ideas and come back here soon.

OKEH! See ya people! I can’t wait to continue my blogging activities! Not only to fill my blog just like yesterday(s), but also to see comments and greeting from you, bloggers!

Say “Hepiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!”

_a.risk-taker_

See Ya Soon (or not?)

I’m in a huge stress, -a real huge one- so I’ll put this blog on a long hiatus. It shouldn’t be too long, if I can make myself get better soon.

Love ya, everyone!



P.S : But I will keep online-ing on Facebook as often as possible. See you there if you want to see me (Ngarepp! Siapa juga yang mau ketemu orang lagi stress???!!!)

_a.risk-taker_

It’s Not That I’m Afraid to Lose You…Maybe...

Dia punya rencana kuliah di UNAIR, mengejar cita-citanya jadi dokter.
Gue punya rencana kuliah di UGM…atau UM.
Oke, mungkin emang bener gue masih punya waktu 1 tahun lagi sampai hari itu tiba…
Tapi dengan keadaan gue sama dia nggak terikat apapun,
Gue nggak tahu gimana gue bakal bisa menyikapi 1 tahun sisa itu dengan baik-baik saja…
Maksud gue, yang betul-betul dengan baik-baik saja.

Jogja – Surabaya…
Atau Malang – Surabaya…
Gimana caranya biar dia tahu…gue sangat takut pada jarak itu nanti?

Aargh!

Gue merinding kalo nginget-nginget itu lagi.
Rasanya darah di sekujur tubuh gue mengalir deras…
Dan ada pisau yang dengan tak nampaknya menyayat hati gue…sedikit…

Sampai sekarang aja gue masih belum berhasil nemuin jawaban kenapa gue bisa jatuh cinta sama dia…
Ketika rasanya gue butuh waktu lebih lama lagi untuk itu,
Dia malah udah berencana mau pergi...

Gue jadi tolol gara-gara cinta, kayaknya…
Belum tentu juga dia mikirin gue sampe segininya…

_a.risk-taker_

I Think I’m Gonna Take The Risks Again This Time

Ya Allah...

Gue tahu apa konsekuensinya kalo gue membiarkan diri gue jatuh cinta lagi…
Another pain and another hurt…
Gue tahu apa resiko jatuh cinta lagi sama dia…
Dicuekinnya lebih sering daripada diperhatiinnya…

But, I keep going…
I wanna know how its ending comes…
And I wanna try to through it all with all my strength…
Cause I know that he will always be my favorite addictive drug…

We’ll see how it ends…
Dan kalo ini melukai gue lagi untuk kesekian kalinya…
Dan membuatnya berdarah-darah lagi…
Toh gue udah tahu kemana mencari kasa dan perbannya…

_a.risk.taker_

Love...is Confusing

Gue baru pulang dari LDK OSIS di Telaga Ngebel, mau update dikit. Gue belum bisa masang foto-foto Ngebel disini soalnya masih di kamera Si Beib sama Bu Enny. Bring them soon, I promise!

***

Take a look at these picture.


All that I can do is take a deep heavy breath...
A real deep and heavy breath...
Those picture, made me think...

Anyway, thanks a bunch for Andyka, the one who took those pictures yesterday.

_a.risk.taker_

Jangan Percaya pada Dua Foto di Bawah Ini!!!

Dua foto di bawah adalah hasil scripting, tidak alamiah. Bagi kawan-kawan dunia nyata gue yang kadang baca blog ini, PERHATIAN : ini hanya untuk iseng semata. Biasaaa, kalo iseng saya sama ‘suami gadungan’ saya itu lagi kumat. Sok-sokan kami berdua bikin foto mesra. Jadinya aneh, soalnya pake hape Komandan yang notabene masih VGA. Foto diambil pas acara traktiran ultah Mia (happy birthday, Mi!), kedai steak yang lumayan rame di Ponorogo, Sabtu kemarin.

CAUTION : They’re faking poses!

after taking the photos, we both laughed out loud together. Oh, how we looked like a real couple on those! So cute. Haha!

Do you guys enjoy your weekend? Cuz I do. Tadi pagi pas jogging, gue ketemu sama kiper cakep, the one whom I have a crush on pas futsal kemarin. Dia lagi latihan sepak bola gitu. Oh, my! Kok bisa ya gue nggak ketemu dia sebelum-sebelum ini, padahal tiap minggu gue pasti jogging? Baru tadi pagi gue tahu dia ternyata latihan di deket tempat gue parkir motor. Dan sepertinya, setiap Minggu dia selalu latihan di situ. Emang mata gue aja yang nggak pernah jelalatan ke sekumpulan anak yang lagi latihan bola.
Ah, dia tampan sekaleeeee!!! He’s so damn gorgeous! Meskipun gue pernah menganggap 123 itu gorgeous, tapi yang ini more more and 100% more gorgeous!

‘Hei, lelaki tampan, boleh tahu nomer hape kamu gak?’ is the sentence that I wished I could say this morning to him. But I didn’t, although my friends said that he was looking at me many times while I sat on my motorbike…

Thanks for coming and (or even) reading! See ya!

_love.phobia_

Hujan… Gue Cuman Bengong…dan Posting Tak Jelas Ini

Hujaaaaannn!! Hate it! I know, my mom prohibite me to. But, I just don’t like it. Berisiknya bikin takut plus deg-degan.

Hujan-hujan…gue nggak punya kerjaan. Belajar PKn bentar, soalnya besok ulangan, terus bengong. Jadilah gue membuka laptop dan mulai mengetik postingan yang nggak jelas ini.

Hujan-hujan…oh, ya hapenya Siput hilang! Raib! Tadi maghrib dia sms gue. Kasian deh ‘selingkuhan’ gue yang satu itu. Terus, Hunian…she broke up with her boyfriend (now, ex-). She’s deeply broken. Wish her get better soon. Terus, Si Beib ikut lomba ICT. Wish him all the best.

***

Hari ini, si cewek rese yang naksir 123 itu telepon gue lagi. Tapi tadi gue lagi ke kamar mandi, dan hape gue tinggal di tas. Ah, sutralah! Biarin aja dia pusing sendiri. Males banget gue sama tuh orang. Bikin gondok. Mendingan gue nyambi baca New Moon punya Vita di kelas tadi.

Sejak kemarin, gue pakai jilbab baru. Kata anak-anak, oke banget. Hehe...padahal menurut gue biasa aja. Tapi yang bikin aneh, komentar 123. Dia ngomong ke Hunian :

“Eh, temen lo ganti jilbab ya. Pantes lho. Bilangin ke dia ya?!”
“BILANG AJA SENDIRI!” Hunian cuek.

Ngapain coba komen gitu? Kayak yang komentar dia penting aja buat gue! Dasar aneh.

Apalagi yaaaahh??? (muka bego sambil garuk-garuk kepala)

OH YA!

Lya mimpi bagus tentang gue kemarin malem. Semoga aja jadinya juga bagus…hihi…piss ah!

Ada beberapa foto nih :

anak-anak penuh minat pada penghitungan tumbukan bola dengan papan ring, couple days ago, pas basket.

i bought a new long-tee (kenapa di foto keliatan gede yah?). dan gue mix sama blazer cokelat gue. aneh nggak sih?(ok, I know, selera fashion yang payah!)

foto resmi pas Kakang Senduk kemarin. nobody believes me when I tell them that’s me.

Thanks for coming and (or even) reading! See ya!

_love.phobia_

Hidung Gue, Bangku Cadangan, Cewek Rese dan Paduan Suara

Bingung nggak sih baca judulnya? Banyak gitu? Hehe…

There are four main ideas for this new post.

First, hidung gue.
Aargh! Hidung gue kemarin kena bola basket pas latihan basket di sekolah. Huwaaaa!! Sakiiit…Gue sampe berurai air mata. Padahal gue nggak niat nangis, tapi tau-tau keluar sendiri, huhu…untung nggak sampe mimiszan.
Hidung gue ini emang udah dasarnya mancung-nggak-jadi, eh malah kena bola basket melulu pas latihan. Bisa jadi mancung ke dalam ntar. Oh, God! Don’t let that thing happen! I love my nose. Everybody does love their nose. Who doesn’t?

Second, bangku cadangan.
Kayaknya pas tanding basket nanti gue dicadangin, deh. Selain karena gue baru masuk tim 2 minggu terakhir ini, mata kaki gue cedera. Ngilu-ngilu gitu. It sucks, if you ask me how does it feel…
So, welcome to the spare seat! Yeah!

Third, cewek rese.
Aduuh…cewek yang naksir 123 itu nggak berhenti-berhenti deh gangguin gue! Ugh! Gue kan udah bilang sama dia, I’m not 123’s ex-girlfriend. But she didn’t want to listen! Annoyiiiing! Ya ampooon! Kalo lo naksir dia, sok atuh, gue juga nggak minat! Ambil, deh! Abis-abisin sono! Gue nggak doyan! (or at least, I’m trying so hard to ignore him!). And stop acting like you’re fc*k*ng d*mn a b*tch, girl!
Gue semalem curhat sama bonyok soal itu cewek dan mereka bilang, mending gue ignore aja tuh cewek. Psikopat tuh orang. Masa ngejar-ngejar 123 sampe segitunya. Kayak yang cowok di dunia ini cuma 123 aja! Huh! Lama-lama gue kasian juga sama tuh cewek…

Fourth, paduan suara.
Besok kelas gue kebagian jadi petugas upacara dan nggak seperti yang udah-udah, gue kali ini kebagian jadi paduan suara. And I’ll be singing there, friends! Dari SMP gue nggak pernah kebagian jadi paduan suara. Padahal pengen banget. Pas SMP, 2 kali kebagian jatah jadi petugas upacara, dapet pembaca do’a sama pembaca preambule UUD 45. Pas SMA ini, pengibar bendera. Finally. Wish us luck, ya!

Well, that’s all. Thanks for coming and (or even) reading! See ya!

_love.phobia_

I Caught Myself - Paramore

Down to you
You're pushing and pulling me down to you
But I don't know what I

*
Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
From saying something
That I should've never thought
Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
From saying something
That I should've never thought of you of you

**
You're pushing and pulling me down to you
But I don't know what I want
No, I don't know what I want

You got it, you got it
Some kind of magic
Hypnotic, hypnotic
You're leaving me breathless
I hate this, I hate this
You're not the one I believe in
With God as my witness

back to *
back to **

Don't know what I want
But I know it's not you
Keep pushing and pulling me down
But I know in my heart it's not you

back to *

I knew, I know in my heart it's not you
I knew, but now I know what I want, I want, I want
Oh no, I've should have never thought

~~~

Oh, God…I don’t wanna be in love with him anymore…help me…I just wanna live my life without his name…

_love.phobia_

Masalahnya...Gara-Gara 'Mbak-Mbak' PPL...

Today is just another exhausting day...


Jadi...hari ini ada 'Mbak-Mbak' PPL Jurusan Bahasa Inggris gitu di sekolah gue. Nah yang kebagian kelas gue. Anak-anak, entah kenapa, kayak udah kesepakatan bikin keributan yang tak terkendali. Hwahaha! Pada heri alias heboh sendiri semua.
Kami, satu kelas, disuruh bikin kelompok dan bikin dialog dari cerita yang dibacakan si Mbak PPL. Kami semua pada minta dipilihkan...

And...

Ah! Suer, nyebelin abis tuh 'Mbak-Mbak'nya! Lagi-lagi gue kepaksa satu kelompok sama 123...huuuuhh...mana dialognya ada yang mesti ngelibatin cuma kami berdua lagi...
Jadilah gue abis dikeroyok olokan dari anak-anak...

Aaaaaaaarrghh!

Sebel!

Terus, 123 juga rese banget lagi! Kenapa juga gue mesti salting tiap dia ngajak gue diskusi dialog? Ough! Menyebalkaaaaaannn!
Kelompok cuman berisi 3 anak, selain gue sama 123 ada si Rois. Tapi dia juga-nyebelin-banget-pake-nget ngolokin gue sama 123 terus...

Apa nggak cukup gue kerja satu kelompok sama 123 pas kesenian di jam pelajaran sebelumnya? Dan bikin gue nyium bau parfumnya yang, lagi-lagi dengan sangat menyebalkannya, membuat gue yang seharusnya sebel sama dia, jadi nggak bisa sebel!

Denial phase, kata Ibu. Gue suka sama 123, tapi nggak mau ngaku...is that so?

Tauk, deh...

_love.phobia_


P.S : Minggu depan tim basket gue bakal tanding sama SMK PGRI Ponorogo. Wish us luck, yea!

Confused...

aduh...masa gue masih salting sih di depan 123????????????????


it's a BIG annoying feeling that I have...


T_T

_love.phobia_