Such A Long Time ...

Yeah, babies …
For such a long time I didn’t write anything here. I’m lack of ideas. Too stressed with schools. Sorry …
What I mean ‘stressed’ here is that I’m now in my last grade of high school. Courses, studies, woo…they give me some kind of stressfull opening of my new academy year. Next year, I’VE GOT TO BE GRADUATED from high school and GOT TO BE ACCEPTED in University State of Malang or the second choice, University State of Surabaya. I really don’t wanna think about it hard, cause I know that it might make me more stressed. But yeah, I have a brain that does its work too good so that I can’t stop thinking about it. Perfect.
And yeah, I did look for something that can make me forget those school things at least for a while. I started a new business! It’s a pre-order clothing business. Open it from my fb account, Freundin Onlineshop. I’ll make my own money, Daddy! :D

Anyways…my relationship with Rizal goes well. Perfectly well. And I love it. And love him too. :)

I actually still have many stories that I got to tell you. But like I said, I’m lack of ideas how to spill it. Hmph…

Start from now, I’ll try to keep this blog updated. Really.

Thanks!

_viel.Liebe_

Enjoyed Holiday : Bali

Habis dari Pacitan, istirahat di rumah 2 hari, gue berlayar ke Bali. Huiiiiihh! Yang satu ini tak terlupakan. Beneran! ‘Wow’ abis! Liburan bareng temen-temen seangkatan yang paling unforgettable!
Hari pertama, kami ke Sanur, Tanjung Benoa, GWK, Tanjung Benoa lagi, Joger, terus ke Kuta.
Hari kedua, kami nonton tari Barong (gara-gara gak dapet kursi, kami nonton putaran kedua), ke Pusat Jajan Bali, ke Galuh, nonton Barong yang nggak jadi tadi, pasar seni Sukowati, pusat grosir Karang Kurnia, terus Tanah Lot. Di tanah lot gue males masuk pura, jadinya poto-poto aja.
Hari ketiga, kita ke Bedugul sama Pantai Lovina, terus pulang. Nah, pas pulang ini yang bakal gue kenang seumur hidup. He declared his feeling that night on the bus! Iyayy!!! I’ve been just wondering about that, and then that happened! You have no idea how blushing I was! Aaahh! And I answer ‘YES’ to something that he asked me. Bus, I’m in love!
Well, still there are 5 days to come before back to school. And I can’t hardly wait for school and fight for my future!
Give you some pictures, for more, see my facebook account.

See ya, people!

_a.risk-taker_

Holiday Plants or Plans?

Before all :
Gue dapet foto ini pas ke sekolah Sabtu kemarin. Terserah mau ditanggepin gimana. Atau juga nggak ditanggepin, mereka nggak akan keberatan. Hehe...

***
Minggu depan, gue ke Bali! Iyayy! Excited. Mantep!
Gue baru ngedaftar lagu yang mau gue masukin ke mp3 gue buat didengerin selama perjalanan, baru ngerencanain make baju apa di hari pertama, sampe ketujuh di sana. Haha! Yeah, silly. Tapi fun karena gue lagi nganggur libur di rumah.
I’ve got 2 new piece of clothes. Cardigan and a Moslem suit. I don’t know why my mother suddenly become very generous to me. Hehe…

By the way, Hunian bikin huru-hara! Wiiiaaah! Dia ngasih tahu 123 tentang sms konyol gue yang udah lama disimpen Hunian. Dikirimlah ke 123. Gue belum tahu apa reaksinya. Tapi kata Hunian, SEMPURNA. Hah! What? Yang ada gue malu mampus!!

Benjo!!! Besok gue rapat outbound. Hhh! Liburan gue kayaknya penuh dengan acara pergi-pergian, nih. Ke Pacitan, Bali, Jogja. Outbound, tour, shopping week with my mom. Wew! Gonna be tiring weeks. In fact, gue nggak suka mengisi liburan dengan plesiran. Gue mah pilih bikin sarang di kamar, terus bertelor di semua sudut rumah selama liburan (burung?).

Bye, wish you a lovely holiday, pals!

:) :D :P

_a.risk-taker_

Futsal, Booking Tribun

Kemarin, gue nonton futsal di GOR. Hari UAS terakhir dan sekolah gue pas main. Jadi, gue berniat refreshing. Tapi jadinya malah frustrating. I’ll tell your later.
***
Oke, kemarin ternyata 123 juga nonton. Hampir seminggu setelah kelas kami terpisah karena UAS, kami nggak nyapa sama sekali. Meskipun, kemarin lusa dia ngejatohin hape gue (yes, he did!). Terus, diledekin sama anak-anak. Well, that doesn’t matter anymore now.
Pas gue dateng, gue duduk di tribun atas dia, agak ke kiri. Dia nggak tahu gue dateng atau emang nggak mau tahu (terserah!), kami diem-dieman. Rollercoaster bener dah tuh orang! Kemarin udah bener-bener nyenengin bisa ketawa-tawa, nah hari berikutnya dia intoxicating sekaliiiiiii.
Gue ditarik sama anak-anak buat duduk di dekat dia. Gue ogah. Tauk kenapa, males banget. Terus setelah nonton partai berikutnya setelah sekolah gue main (FYI, we losT_T), dia pulang. Pamit cuman ke Si Beib, nggak ngeliat even ngelirik gitu ke gue. Ugh! Annoying!
MENYEBALKAAAAN SEKALEEEEEE!!!!
***
He’s my friend, classmates when we’re in our tenth grade. Anak futsal. Habis main kemarin, dia duduk sama anak-anak yang lain di tribun. Nah, berhubung banyak tribun yang kosong, hehe…dia tiduran aja disitu. Haha…berasa itu tribun udah dia booking khusus gitu. Gue ketawa sama anak-anak liat posisi tidur dia. Dan bebalnya, dia nggak sadar diketawain. Kami makin keras ketawa. Wkwkwk…
***
Kalo ada yang tau status fb gue kemarin, I hate those words actually, now. But I won’t erase them anyway. That’s a trace of what I had yesterday. But, I do feel so much better now.

Well, thank you for peeking! See you guys!

_a.risk-taker_

Us, Who were Looking For Something to Remember

Ah, Juni!
Bulan depan Bali udah nunggu buat disamperin. Sounds exciting. Pantai, pura, shops, dan best friends!

Dan oh, ya!
Pacar! Kalau punya…

Eh, kayaknya kalo di‘tembak’ di Bali nanti, seru juga, ya?! Romantis, tepatnya. Di Kuta, pas sunset. Oh, how sweet…

I know it would never happen to me, but hei…I have my own dream. And there’s nothing wrong about dreaming, right?

Kalo sampe iya pun, aku nggak bakal nerima. Aku juga nggak bisa nolak, kalo dia (baca:123). Aku bakal bilang, “Tunggu aku pas hari kelulusan…but this, would be the sweetest memory I’ve ever got…from you, Love…”

Haha! I sound silly, don’t I? Or pathetic? Which one do you think I do?

I went to Ngebel couple weeks ago. Sorry for the late. I’ve reached the limit of my net connection. So I had to wait to post it on 1^st of June. Hehe…

It was a great day! High school…
First year : Nerd, plain
Second year : Play, fun, naughty
Third year : Pray, struggle

_a.risk-taker_

My New Header

Anyone could guess what's the picture about?

_a.risk-taker_

I Can’t Forgive People Easily, Doesn’t Mean That I Can’t Forgive At All

He did something wrong yesterday.
And I felt like I was the only person who’s trying to keep this relationship goes right.
And simply, he didn’t even realize that he’s done something wrong yesterday.
He acted like everything was “OKAY” this morning. In fact, everything wasn’t “OKAY”. Well, at least for me.
But then, he did something nice today, without even saying ‘sorry’ for what he’s done yesterday.

He’s just so insensitive. And that fact, makes me wonder even harder, “Why do I love that kind of guy?”. I’ve been always dreaming about a guy whom is so sensitive to whatever I feel. And he’s absolutely not. Not at all.
Hhmm…I’m sick and tired of these…but I just can’t quit. Knowing he loves me so, with all his imperfections, that’s enough and I’ll stand it for some more time ahead. I guess…

You’re not perfect, and so am I. So, love, lets make this relationship goes perfect with our imperfections and our immature attitude. I’m trying, I hope so are you.

To you, with all my weakness and strength in a box with a ribbon on it…

Hhh…I don’t know I just love him so bad…weird…

_a.risk-taker_

What I Hate and I Love

So, how was everything going, people? On my spot, everything’s just great! I’ll tell you why, at the end of the post. Well now I’m gonna share the things I hate and I love. I did arrange them from the most. So, here they are :


:( Called by “Sitoh” by anyone but my Nimo. Ugh! Why can’t they just respect my own name? Call me “Mazhi” or “Masithoh” and I will appreciate you more!
:( Snake!
:( Pink!
:( Shrimp! Ugh! I’m allergic to shrimp!
:( Being fooled! Well, who doesn’t?
:( Got my SMS unreplied. Feels like I’m alone. Really.
:( Too many holiday(s)! I hate that! School is the only place where I can meet him,123!
:( Backstabbers! They’re so mean!
:( Got a bad mark for Biology. It makes me feel so stupid!
:(‘kancrut” songs, by ‘kancrut” bands!
:( Got sweaty when I’m nervous.
:( Failed to throw my basketball in.
:( Found my shoes in a dusty condition in my cupboard.

:) My family!
:) 123!
:) Everything that contains green in it!
:) Sneakers!
:) Being loved. Well, who doesn’t?
:) Stay longer at school with him.
:) Love songs! Especially, which is sung by guys.
:) Love stories! Make me wanna be them, in the story.
:) Facebook! Haha!
:) Finally got what I want for a long time.
:) My books!
:) My room!
:) My cell phone.
:) My notebook.
:) My blog.
:) Found my uniform was ready to wear.
:) Shouting “Yes, I did it!”. Makes me feel so genius. Weird, huh?
:) Internet!

***

The reason why everything was so great this week is that I’m getting closer with him. Messages every afternoon or night and a li’l conversation at school. He makes my everyday!
But still, I can’t find my reason why I love him. Some may say, there’s always ‘why’ for anything that happened, but this one, there’s no ‘why’. Well, no ‘why’ needed actually…to fall in love. Yes or no?

_a.risk-taker_

Today was A Love Day! Iyay!

Yes, it was!

I know I may sound a little bit corny, but that’s the fact! Today was my love day! LOL. He asked me to talk about something which was a little bit serious, and the beginning was sooo sweet…

For such a long time we didn’t talk the way we did today. He didn’t even know my number, so he couldn’t ask me anything he may needed to know (I changed my number a month a go).
Sooo...he asked me about my number and I gave it. He wrote it on his book, then he kept it in his bag. I told him not to lose it again, cause he’s ever done it before. Then he asked me why I changed my number. ‘Was it that girl?’, he asked. The girl was the topic that we discussed today. She bothered me so that I had to change my number. But I answered, ‘No, it wasn’t. She’s just the small part, not the big one.’ I skipped the chance to answer his question honestly.

AND HE DID ASK ME about someone who declared his feeling to me a month a go (which was my biggest reason why I changed my number, honestly, but I didn't tell him). He did care about that! Wow! What a sweet fact!

Then we talked, talked, talked and talked. My besties did disturb us when we were talking. And I can’t believe they recorded it! Ugh! But it was funny to watch. Haha! And he, 123, caught Si Beib when he recorded us from outside the class. I wish you were there to see Si Beib’s face when he got caught! Haha!
After that conversation, I’ve got to lead a meeting with some of first grader. And he waited me for that. Then we walked together to the parking area and went home happily.Hehe...

What a sweet day!

_a.risk-taker_

It’s Not That I’m Afraid to Lose You…Maybe...

Dia punya rencana kuliah di UNAIR, mengejar cita-citanya jadi dokter.
Gue punya rencana kuliah di UGM…atau UM.
Oke, mungkin emang bener gue masih punya waktu 1 tahun lagi sampai hari itu tiba…
Tapi dengan keadaan gue sama dia nggak terikat apapun,
Gue nggak tahu gimana gue bakal bisa menyikapi 1 tahun sisa itu dengan baik-baik saja…
Maksud gue, yang betul-betul dengan baik-baik saja.

Jogja – Surabaya…
Atau Malang – Surabaya…
Gimana caranya biar dia tahu…gue sangat takut pada jarak itu nanti?

Aargh!

Gue merinding kalo nginget-nginget itu lagi.
Rasanya darah di sekujur tubuh gue mengalir deras…
Dan ada pisau yang dengan tak nampaknya menyayat hati gue…sedikit…

Sampai sekarang aja gue masih belum berhasil nemuin jawaban kenapa gue bisa jatuh cinta sama dia…
Ketika rasanya gue butuh waktu lebih lama lagi untuk itu,
Dia malah udah berencana mau pergi...

Gue jadi tolol gara-gara cinta, kayaknya…
Belum tentu juga dia mikirin gue sampe segininya…

_a.risk-taker_

Don’t Have Anything to Say…

Karena gue lagi mampet kata-kata buat ditulis…gue mau cerita ngasal aja, ya (emang gue sering ngasal kalo posting, hehe…)

1. Gue kemarin malem mimpi ular lagi. Entah kenapa tiap gue mimpi ular-ular, selalu ular yang pendek, warnanya kuning item selang-seling gitu. Aneh.

2. Gue lagi glowing alias tersanjung. Seriously…bukan judul sinetron doang! Someone asked me about something deep just now. Hehe…

3. Gue lagi…nyelesain Eclipse.

4. Gue lagi bingung. Suer! Laptop gue kena virus. Nah, ntu virus bikin sistem search, find, and taskman gue ilang. Pas kemarin gue scan pake PCMAV 2.0, kedeteksi sih tapi pas gue clean dan mau dicek lagi, laptop gue malah mematikan diri. Kata sebuah majalah TI (lupa namanya) yang pernah gue baca, itu adalah cara virus itu buat ngelindungin dirinya dari antivirus.

Terus gue mesti gimana, dong??? Help meeee…!!!

5. Gue lagi gandrung sama Rehab-Rihanna…beatnya keren mampussss!!!

Baby, baby

When we first met
I never felt something so strong
You were like my lover
And my best friend
All wrapped into one
With a ribbon on it
And all of a sudden
you went and left
I didn't know how to follow
It's like a shock
That spun me around
And now my heart's dead
I feel so empty and hollow

And I'll never give myself to another
The way I gave it to you
Don't even recognize
The ways you hurt me
Do you?
It's gonna take a miracle to bring me back
And you're the one to blame

And now I feel like, oh
You're the reason
Why I'm thinking
I don't wanna smoke on
These cigarettes no more
I guess that's what I get
For wishful thinking
Should've never let you enter my door
Next time you wanna go on and leave
I should just let you go on and do it
Cause now I'm using like I bleed
It's like I checked into rehab
Baby you're my disease
It's like I checked into rehab
Baby you're my disease
I gotta check into rehab
'Cause baby you're my disease
I gotta check into rehab
'Cause baby you're my disease

Damn,
Ain't it crazy
When you're loveswept
You'll do anything
For the one you love
'Cause anytime
That you needed me
I'd be there
It's like
You were my favorite drug
The only problem is
That you was using me
In a different way
That I was using you
But now that I know
That it's not meant to be
You gotta go
I gotta wean myself off of you

Ini lagu gue banget...mati rasa sekujur tubuh kalo lagu ini berkumandang... (lebay mode : on)

Well, ada yang bisa bantuin gue ngilangin virus laptop gue diatas??? I need ur help...really...

_a.risk-taker_

I Think I’m Gonna Take The Risks Again This Time

Ya Allah...

Gue tahu apa konsekuensinya kalo gue membiarkan diri gue jatuh cinta lagi…
Another pain and another hurt…
Gue tahu apa resiko jatuh cinta lagi sama dia…
Dicuekinnya lebih sering daripada diperhatiinnya…

But, I keep going…
I wanna know how its ending comes…
And I wanna try to through it all with all my strength…
Cause I know that he will always be my favorite addictive drug…

We’ll see how it ends…
Dan kalo ini melukai gue lagi untuk kesekian kalinya…
Dan membuatnya berdarah-darah lagi…
Toh gue udah tahu kemana mencari kasa dan perbannya…

_a.risk.taker_